With no knowledge of pyrotechnics and a Brownie badge in first-aid, I agree to take on the role of Art director for slick monochromaniacs Dark Horses new music video ‘Saturn Returns’.
I’m a last minute stand-in and half the work of sourcing props has already been done. Which is great as the list makes for quite bizarre reading, including ‘an ostrich egg’, ‘a handful of dead poppies’ and ‘the unconscious object’. Even after handling ‘the unconscious object’, I still don’t know what it is, but stay with me and try to imagine a giant plaster cast squid-cum-cactus that may contain mystical powers.
The day is long and fraught with last minute adjustments to schedule as the crew bow down to the Director’s perfectionist eye, knowing the end result will be worth it. My personal success hinges on one moment: the hanging and burning of a giant mirror in a public carpark. (Don’t ask about the gymnastics involved in tethering the thing to some metal overhear railings). That’s right, I’ve got to make a mirror go on fire, outside in the wind, without petrol, under the scrutiny of at least three security cameras. Then, as it ignites, I must step swiftly out of shot… and put out the flames at the perfect moment… and make sure the inferno doesn’t burn through my fishing wire rig too soon, shattering glass over the heads of the band and cameraman. The odds are stacked against this going well. I am super-nervous.
The night is black. Tired and tense, the last fifteen of us stand shivering in our positions. As the clapper-board comes down, I leap forward, recklessly squeezing and spraying lighter fluid from full cans held in both of my gardening-gloved fists. Who will come first, the police or the ambulance?
Neither. A vague blue flash runs along the mirror’s frame and disappears. CUT. TAKE TWO – and this time I go double-crazy on the lighter fluid. Nothing. Eventually I work out some elaborate way of taping poison-soaked toilet paper to the ill-fated looking-glass, without it being noticeable. This time we get results! – Flickering azure tongues lash at lead singer Lisa Elle’s reflection.
Apparently the mirror scene didn’t make the final edit. Dark Horses – Saturn Returns comes out in March, so I guess You Tube will let us know for sure.
Words and photography by Rachel James